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, by Lauren Rosenfeld

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Product details

File Size: 3549 KB

Print Length: 289 pages

Publisher: Atria Books/Beyond Words (April 1, 2014)

Publication Date: April 1, 2014

Sold by: Simon and Schuster Digital Sales Inc

Language: English

ASIN: B00DPM7U8K

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Amazon Best Sellers Rank:

#405,786 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)

The premise of this book "Breathing Room" is that all of the clutter we have in our homes is ultimately simply a manifestation of the clutter we carry within our hearts. These emotional blockages and physical blockages end up clocking the light of our soul our true essence and our connection to the world,to other human beings,to nature and to the Divine. This book is a "bible" of decluttering techniques that helps us find a way to take away our mental,emotional and physical clutter so that we can live in that deeply rooted deeply connected way that we're meant to live in the present moment in happiness,love,joy,peace and contentment. Unfortunately the clutter we have is always trying to draw us away from the moment which is why we are so unhappy when we live with clutter. There are Buddhist philosophical underpinning for this very important work but no matter what your religious traditions the spiritual principles are the same. Do this really powerful spiritual work; work of letting go and knowing the beauty of enough,knowing the beauty of contentment and happiness and we can't learn that until we find the willingness this open spirit to let go of what needs to go. Decluttering is not an "end all be all" it's a lifestyle an ongoing thing.

I love the approach of this book! Our internal world is reflected in our external world, and vice versa. Clearing the clutter in our environment helps us have a space to live that is more inviting, purposeful, and intentional. The book is spiritually thought-provoking, but also action-oriented. I have specific exercises that I can choose from based on my needs. I'll continue to use this book as a resource for many years to come.

I was hunting for help to declutter after a sudden move that left me buried in boxes/piles and way too much stuff. I was looking for the mechanics of organizing my space when I stumbled upon Breathing Room. I couldn't help but to see myself in Lauren's and Melva's descriptions and examples of why I was stuck in all this stuff. But these two incredible women not only tell you why but how to get out of the clutter. The first thing I did was to decide what I wanted to feel in each room. I posted these words in each room and then sat with them for a couple days. I stopped trying to tackle the clutter which just turned into moving piles around. By far the best advice I gleaned was to first start with the things that truly evoked the feelings that I wanted to experience in each space rather than focusing on what needed to go. Focusing on what was truly valuable to me made letting go of the other stuff very easy. When I was surrounded by boxes and piles, something else thrown on the pile didn't trigger the sense that it didn't belong there. Now after doing so much clearing, it is easy for me to recognize when something is out of place and easy to quickly put it where it belongs. I took the advice of another reader and went through my closet and my clothes. That was amazingly freeing. I still have much more to do, but I am inspired to keep going. I also pay a great deal of attention to what I bring into my home. Stopping the clutter at the door before it enters is so much easier to manage. Thank you Lauren and Melba. You threw me a rope when I thought I was drowning.

This is an absolute must-have if you are moving. We are downsizing (dramatically) and it would have been impossible to go from 4000 sq ft to 1000 sq ft without this book!!!! After reading this book, it was very clear what was important and what was just "stuff". The most freeing feeling in the world, is letting go of stuff!!! It truly takes the weight of the world off your shoulders. It frees you up to be open to love and new possibilities. As empty-nester's, down-sizing with Breathing Room made a huge difference in my relationship with my husband. We have removed "stuff" and gotten so much closer. It is as if the "stuff" was a wall between us. If YOU want freedom, READ THIS BOOK!!!!

Breathing Room is yet another variation on the theme of using the decluttering process to change your life: in this case, decluttering as “a spiritual process that involves coming into communion with what is truly important” [Kindle location 96]. Breathing Room offers a different and unusual definition of clutter is -- anything that’s getting in the way of you living your life the way you want: Here’s the deal, and it’s pretty darned simple: Whether the clutter is in your home, heart, mind, or spirit; if it’s weighing you down, crowding you out, blocking your light, cramping your style; if it’s become an obstacle you keep stumbling over; if it continually cuts you with a broken, jagged edge; if it’s stopping you from finding the things you really love, then it’s time for you to let it go [245].The authors’ “honest truth” is that “you only have room and time for what you truly love, [357] hence the need “for you to make some space for what truly matters. It’s time you found a little breathing room” [248].It’s important to understand that this definition of clutter is distinctly different from what you or I might have in mind. By Breathing Room’s definition, a cluttered desk or nest of things in a closet is not really clutter if it’s not getting in your way; conversely, a single object could be clutter if it’s “cramping your style” or “weighing you down.” In effect, defining your things (or your emotions or thoughts for that matter) as clutter depends more or less entirely on their effect on you.In this context, it’s not surprising that Breathing Room makes large, outsized claims about the stakes and potential benefits of the decluttering process. Green and Rosenfeld assert that “decluttering is a deep spiritual practice that can bring you closer to your true self, the people you love, and your Divine Source” [238]. In their view, one’s clutter is hiding “spiritual lessons and emotional ah-has” which are there waiting to help you liberate your home and your heart, “give flight to your spirit and rock your world” [144]. Perhaps this is because the authors’ experiences were based on their work with extreme cases (co-author Green was a consultant on the TV show Hoarders), I found myself wondering if the primary audience for this book is serious hoarders, for which the heavy spiritual emphasis is an antidote; extreme problems demand extreme solutions.Although Breathing Room recognizes that the decluttering process is a “complex” and “personal” journey and that “only you know how to make that journey safe and comfortable” [149-153], this happens in the context of its “spiritual method of decluttering” which is called SLICE, an acronym for “Stop and Listen. Intend. Clear the Energy” [165]. The method itself is demanding — the first step (Stop and Listen) asks no less of you than to “change your habits of being” [176] — and for me it goes off track by reading too much into our clutter, which for them represents “our history, fears, worries, and uncomfortable and painful emotions” [182]. Indeed, the authors assert that our emotions “tend to generate clutter” [188] that “blocks our hearts” [330]. The solution to all this is to use decluttering to create empty spaces, which are “full of pure potential, a vast openness into which we can invite any energy we desire” [265].This does not match my experience with my own decluttering efforts. For instance, Breathing Room’s assertion that “we create our clutter unconsciously, through indecision, fear, and running away” is rather naive if you ask me; our consumerist society which encourages us to accumulate things thoughtlessly has a major role to play in this too. The authors also seem to uncritically criticize all “time-saving” devices that in fact “are not only consuming physical space and time, but they are also taking up mental and emotional energy” [353]. There is an element of truth to this in many cases, but I still happen to think a blender is quite handy, thank you.As a result, I found Breathing Room’s approach to be foreign for my own purposes for the most part. For me, decluttering can be a deep spiritual practice, or it can be something far less ambitious than aiming to serve one’s “Highest Self” [234], for instance. I did find some nuggets in Breathing Room here and there. The authors’ advice to listen to your clutter. Yes, clutter speaks. It speaks volumes! It can tell us about our attachments, fears, and worries. It can regale us with regrets about missed opportunities or our disappointments in life. This is not easy stuff that our clutter has to say [504]reminds me of the inner voices I've encountered in my 1000 things projects. The notion that “our lives are overburdened by physical reflections of our emotional exhaustion” [351] could be another useful insight in moderation (vs. as the basis for an entire method or process). The notion of decluttering as relief and release is another appealing concept, but again this can happen without it having to be a spiritual experience.Breathing Room looks like an excellent resource for someone who is in dire straits relative to their relationship with their things, or for someone who wants their decluttering process to be a deep spiritual journey. If that description doesn’t fit you, you’ll most likely find a more simpatico approach elsewhere.

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